Aside from the excessive use of generic truisms and metaphors, authors David D. Abernathy and Naomi C. Ballard manage to transform the fun and exciting world of internet dating into an unappealing 13 week term project. Abernathy and Ballard, two "trained and certified clinical sexologists," succeed in bringing to the public a book which at the bare minimum offers a list of available internet dating services and detailed examinations of three of them. Beyond that, the two bring us a work which takes itself too seriously, undermines the intelligence of the reader (single dater), and is completely one-sided in promoting internet dating as the premier way to meet your love.
From the onset of Chapter 1, it is clear that Abernathy and Ballard implicitly assume quite a bit about the reader. They assume that the reader is sad, lonely, out of shape, unfashionable, and has never interacted with members of the opposite sex before. This is quite a bode of confidence from our clinical sexologists.
And what better way to visualize our ability to focus than through hands-on exercises? While no one can deny that meeting one's true love is a noble and empowering journey, Abernathy and Ballard take the notions of love and companionship so seriously that their exercises just can not be taken seriously.
Now I have never been too cool for school, but I just do not know how to end a letter which starts like this. Between the overdramatic exercises and the lovely poems which intervene each chapter, it becomes evident that the authors are biting off a bit more than they can chew, for a book entitled "Internet Dating."
It is not until Chapter 5, that the authors get to the "heart" of the matter: actual information on internet dating. Abernathy and Ballard analyze three of the most popular dating web sites, Match.com, Matchmaker.com, and Yahoo.com. They go into great detail about each, providing useful information concerning monthly fees, populations of users, and backgrounds of the companies.
By the end of Chapter 15, Abernathy and Ballard have succeeded in answering every question which you did not want an answer for. Every area of human interaction which you thought you were competent in, you are not, according to Abernathy and Ballard. This includes: answering your own profile questions, making a phone call, ending a phone call, assessing how a phone call went, arranging a first date, deciding what to wear, ending a first date, understanding the ins and outs of intimacy, defining the notion of "tenderness," and so on.
There is even a section on alcohol and sex. "In the early stages of a relationship alcohol and sex do not mix. Even one glass of wine drunk on an empty stomach can significantly alter your thought process. Important matters such as safe sex and birth control can be ignored when the passion of the moment is ruling the action."
Thus, if you are looking for information regarding different types of dating services, different qualities of different sites, how to set up accounts, how to be most effective as an online dater, and how to go about internet dating in a safe, fun, and exciting new manner, then keep looking. However, if you have been living in the woods since birth, "Internet Dating: Find Your Mate in 90 Days" just might be what you are looking for.
In these crazy times, only one thing is certain: love is in the air. Valentine's Day is just around the corner, and the internet is bustling with hot singles in your neighborhood. So if you take away anything from our sexologists David D. Abernathy and Naomi C. Ballard, let it be this: "you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you get to Prince Charming," but "every pot has its lid," so "reach out and touch someone."