Dear Goddess,

I?m a single mom with a high-maintenance six-year-old. I feel constantly pulled like a wishbone between my son and fiancé¥' and I feel guilty they both are getting the short end of me! I?m a nervous wreck trying to be Wonder Woman to both of them, and I?m failing miserably!  They are constantly competing for my attention and no matter what I do they always seem to need more of me than I can possibly give.  It seems that whatever I do and wherever I go I leave a trail of disappointment behind me.  What am I doing wrong? And how can I make everyone happy, including myself?

Help me Goddess,

People-pleasing Penelope

Dear Penelope,

Make the following mantra yours:  ?If Mama ain?t happy, ain?t nobody happy!?

It?s high time for you, Penelope, to let the two men in your life discover the fact that you are a source of love and happiness in their life, not the source.  Actually you are going to be pretty close to the source for your son?but, it wouldn?t hurt for him to begin to find additional sources.

It?s as if you have an unspoken agreement with your two boys that you are the Goddess (which is true), and they are mere mortals (which is untrue), and they are in desperate need of whatever ray of sunlight you shine their way. No wonder they feel ripped off and you feel frazzled!

As a goddess, it is your womandate to hold the mirror up to remind them that they have the same divine source as you do.  In fact they both are suns of the divine!

Envision them both awake from their dream of separation, remembering their own source and divinity within themselves, and thus, not needing you?wanting you, yes, but not needing you like they do now.

This may be a bit difficult at first, and it may take a while.  Allow your work to be done in the unspoken silence, seeing them both in your mind?s eye not as fragile helpless creatures, but as powerful, awake, strong, competent, enlightened Gods, in their own right.  In the meanwhile, breathe, and compassionately, yet firmly allow your inner Goddess to lead you through this transition. 

Yes, of course, on one level, you have quite a juggle on your hands; however, the possibility exists here for the three of you to be interdependent and autonomous, wanting each others' company without distorted neediness.  In this way, your son and fiancee might discover their own bond.

One of the most important jobs a Goddess (a true Wonder Woman) has is to be a constant reminder to those around her that they, too, are divine.  I think you are up to the task!

Best of love and luck!

Photo by Jenn Keller