I am a woman trapped in the body of a man. I'm at the midway point in my process of becoming a woman, but you could say that, for now, I'm in 'no-man's land.' I feel so lonely and hungry for love, yet when I go on-line to a 'get-a-human-to-play-with' site, I find that I must choose between "man seeking woman", "woman seeking man", "man seeking man", or "woman seeking woman". I don't fit into any of these categories, yet I fit into all of them. Being a delicate, caring woman and yet a virile and greedy bastard of a man leaves me feeling... well, confused, left out, crazy, freakish, lonely and maybe just beyond the hope of human relationship on this planet. Maybe there is a star in the distant galaxy filled with other 'shemales' like me' one can dream.
But for now, I need help finding my place in this world. I'm tired of looking for love in all the wrong places, I don't feel that porn is in my future and I don't care for the typical gay lifestyle. Do you think there is a shred of hope for someone like me in the love department of life?
Thank you for your patience,
I so appreciate your candor and your question. Yes. I believe that if you truly desire to swim in the deep end of intimacy and not just frolic in the shallow end, then there is a swimming partner out there for you. Keep in mind that the ocean of true love isn't for wimps' many are called, but few actually take the plunge. If you are truly responding to love's yearning and not just reacting to a fantasy born of an inability to be with self, then keep swimming. I believe that there truly is someone out there for EVERYONE' if you are willing to go through the highs and lows of love's initiation.
This stage of love's initiation has nothing to do with your sex-change operation and everything to do with your own self-acceptance and willingness to alter your self-image. Instead of seeing yourself as freakish, you could hold yourself as the ideal woman and the ideal man wrapped up in a single package (no pun intended). You could see your sensitivity and virility as being the best of both worlds. Your compassion and understanding for both genders has made you wise, insightful and quite a catch.
Enjoy your swim,