CRITICULOUS quest log.
Ability scores, infinite
Psionic ability: word choice, diction, cute simile. Magical pronouns
Extraordinary senses: audio description.
Skills: critical perception, types with three fingers, types 40 words per minute
Feats: tenure, cute adjectives, plush sentences, and knowledge of comma placement.
Greetings traveler, it is I, Criticuous. I feel that I should explain my immediate action of perusing the lost scrolls of Qui Nguyen, a legend here in this stadium. I feel as though I should dictate my exact happenings so this way it will be clear to my fellow party, and others, where I disappeared to for an hour an 45 minutes.
I was at the pub down at Halsted Street acquiring training for my spells and abilities. Recognizing me from mystic lands such as America’s comedy, com, and various other online communities, a Mage named Evanore invited me to a judging. I was honored that he had picked me to attend the epic presentation of she Kills Monsters, which takes place in a distant magical land called Athens, Ohio. 1995. Perhaps this was a trap to loot me. I decided to travel with this very tall usher to this event. Perhaps I would level up.
I knew that, before I entered the grand chamber that was dubbed Steppenwolf Theater Company, I’d have to furiously level up and prepare for this performance. I acquired a special ability called audio description, which was a special mystical voice that would tell my visually impaired eyes what would be happening. I made sure that my Meta was all the way up before trekking into the Steppenwolf stadium. I presumed that I would find some of my missing party there but, alas, as I skimmed the names in sadness, not even one name jumped out at me, even telepathically. In the hopes that you, reader, will know them, I have included the names of the event participants below.
Katherine Bangs (AGNES)
Rinska Carrasco-Prestinary (KALIOPE)
Daeshawna Cook (VERA)
Fred Geyer+ (MILES)
Jessica London-Shields (TILLY)
Allie Long (EVIL TINA/FARRAH)
Morgan Maher (ORCUS)
Jose Nateras (STEVE)
Ellie Reed+ (EVIL GABBI/NARROTOR)
Sara Sawicki+ (LILITH)
Richard Traub (CHUCK)
Upon my arrival into the space I realized that I wasn't the only guest that Evanore had invited. Mages were there, as well as elves, and fellow humans were present as well but I happened to be the only reviewer in the throng of fellow spectators.
I sat down just before Curtin and assessed what this was going to be about. I was about to hear a mystical journey about adventure, loss, and discovery and holding onto prized possessions and feelings. I immediately conjured enough Meta to summon my special perception known as audio description, which would allow me to hear, through a headset, the actions that the characters did on stage, the costumes, and scene changes. A pleasant surprise met my ears as Evan Hatfield, also known as Evanore, started articulately describing the set of this event, a kitchen inside of a small house.
This event, she kills monsters soon had me swept up in its depth. Agnes's life is turned upside down when she stumbles upon her late sister’s Dungeons & Dragons notebook. As she embarks on an action-packed quest to save her sister's soul, Agnes comes face to face with homicidal fairies, raunchy ogres, fairies, orcs, demons, spells. And blood thirsty cheerleaders, and discovers a side of herself she never knew existed. Qui Nguyen's touching comedy combines real life, fantasy and 90's pop culture in the search for the badass in us all.
Not only does this flourishing comedy spin with speedy quips, it also manages to touch on deeper subjects in the world today. Agnes not only learns what her sister’s fears are about being gay in a cold cruel world but Agnes learns what it took for her sister to battle her daemons, even if that meant battling them in a different world. This smooth blend of comedy between characters and understanding was just the right touch that hypnotized me to the core. I even put away my red pen as I laughed along with my fellow spectators at a pop culture reference or a funny scene, such as the one where Agnes challenges demonic cheerleaders to a dance off and then kills them while their back is turned.
My special summon of audio description was very helpful, describing the scene in a tone that didn't conflict with the presentation. Evan clearly described the set, actions, facial expressions, and the like, not using overly complicated words or interpreting the story. There was, however, one downfall. The environment prevented my aid from working as effectively as it could have been. The music, which had a higher number of HP than I did, rendered the audio description impossible to hear at times, wounding my eardrums as I attempted to still focus on this brilliant blend of dialogue that did two things in one, invoked a sympathetic look from me whenever a deeper connection between Agnes and her sister and made me titter tantalizingly at some of the pop culture cracks. I was transfixed, gleefully enjoying the entertainment despite the bump with audio description. What really makes this even so powerful is it pinches your attention in a way that just grips you and then keeps stunning you with magic tricks of affectionate scenes that show understanding to the fullest, alongside the action packed scenes that are pumped up a degree by the chosen soundtracks.
Even though the sound tracked rendered audio description useless in some areas because I had to strain my straining to hear what Evan was saying I’d go to see this toss of fun, love, and light again. It was that well put together. Blending a mix of tight morals with the occasional swing of slashing comedy that dices the funny bone this enchanted event had me praising the creator not long after the curtains rose. Despite the fact the music interferes with the audio description it doesn't dwindle the experience down to unenjoyably painful
As a well-known traveler in the land of Chicago, I've been asked to oversee many important battles. Clashes between fairies, spell casting duels, and bar quarrels over gold. In my many explorations I've never treated myself to such a delight; I encourage anyone who finds this quest log to check out this event at the mystical Steppenwolf theater company. You'll not only have a chance to refill your HP while embarking on a quest of laughter, adventure, and love, but I can guarantee that you'll level up in ways that you could have never dreamed of. I sure did.
END OF QUEST LOG